Parenting can be easyand fun when your little one is happy and healthy. However, your parenting sail can get choppy once they decide to throw tantrums. Although it’s almost impossible to stop them from this behavior, you can always bounce back by managing the situation and live happily ever after.
In this article, we will be helping you learn a few nuggets on why this behavior is common and how to deal with your child’s tantrum.
What are Tantrums and Why Do Kids Experience Them?
Tantrums are emotional takeovers that most toddlers experience or employ to deal with bitter feelings.They include a number of reactions such as frustrations, anger, and naïve behaviors. Depending on their age,you’ll witness annoying cries, running,breaking and tearing things apart, accusations etc. For a toddler speculate loud cries, screaming, kicking their feet on the wall, hurting themselves etc.
This behavior can be as a result of:
A “no” to petty items your child demands may cause an emotional flip. This is usually the case when the kid isn’t used to their parents saying no. For example, if you are shopping with your kid and you object their demand for that Barbie bike, they may start throwing tantrums. Such behaviors are a normal thing at the shopping malls and you shouldn’t be surprised if you encounter one.`
Anxiety may seem like agrown-up’s issue but kids do suffer the same. Unlike a mentally grown person, kids overreact to anxiety-provoking circumstances.However, anxiety in kidsis oftena symptom of anti-social behavior as they may be uncomfortable around many people.
3.Depression and Irritability
Just like anxiety,depression can prey on kids leading them to throw constant tantrums.
School going kids find it hard to deal with failures in school. For instance,if they have issues with finishing the homework and doesn't get help, they may end up angry and frustrated. As a way of seeking attention, they can result in ripping books or worse hurting themselves.
It’s defined as a developmental abnormality that impairs theability to communicate and interacting socially. Kids with autism disorder are prone to tantrums. If a bizarre situation occurs,they react by throwing a tantrum since its hard for them to express their issues.
Can Tantrums Be Avoided?
Instead of having to deal with the supersonic screams, you can prevent the situation using the following tips:
Avoid potential disputes. As a parent, always ensure that the child’s daily routine is as consistent as possible. Inconsistent schedules can stress them out leading to tantrums. Additionally, always give 10 minutes prior before shifting activities to mentally prepare them for another activity.
Communication is key in helping avert kids throwing tantrum. Never underestimate their ability to decipher what you are saying. Always communicate the days' schedule and stick to it to minimize surprises.
Allow them to carry their favorite food item or toy while you are running errands. This way, they are occupied giving you humble time to carry out your activities unfettered.
Before heading to an uncontrolled environment like shopping malls, ensure they are well rested to avoid blow up when slightly provoked.
Hide all the off-limit temptations to avoid unnecessary battles. for example, lock all the candy bars and cookies during dinner so they don’t keep seeing them around.
Allow the kid a little control over some things. For example, you can let them choose whether they want a pancake or grilled cheese for lunch. This minimalistic freedom gives them an illusion of control over their own life.
Pick your battles. Unless you are in for it, you should also give in occasionally to avoid these unnecessary battles. After all, you would rather let them have 20 extra minutes of TV rather than have them scream for 2 hours?
Tips to Deal with the Tantrums
Below are seven tips that will helpyou deal with child tantrums. your child brings on your space.
1.Validate and Acknowledge the Child’s Feelings
Children are smart creatures, once they discover you don't like tantrums they can use that to run you over. However, before shouting back at them, establish why they are erupting. This way, it’ll be easier to help them overcome the problem.
Being ignorant can only escalate the situation as they will start to think you don’t care about them and their problems.Being a darlingto your kids creates a favorable atmosphere for them to easily open up on their problems.
Children can be easily distracted which is a great tactic in averting this uncanny behavior.As a parent, knowing the things your kid love and using them to for distraction is another great way of circumventing tantrums.
Additionally, instead of reacting negatively,use of your humorous side and say something “Look baby! In the sky, see that plane flying away.” Or you can just offer something to eat or his favorite toy to play with.
3.Keep it Cool and Ignore the Tantrum
This tip works best at home especially if you’ve noted they have nothing serious bothering them. Simplyrestricting yourself from doing anything as long as the kid is not endangering himself physically helps calm the situation.
Trying to calm the situation by explaining often doesn’t work things out, neither shouting back at them. Although it’s hard for any parent to ignore their kid, you will be amazed at how well this tact works once they realize you are less bothered.
Once they are back to their normal senses, they will know you don’t tolerate such behaviors. After the storm, you can go back to your child and engage in a fun activity to relieve both your gloominess.
If you have been missing church sermons, visiting your favorite restaurant due to the uncontrollable behavior of your kid, offer them incentives for good behavior. Grab a gift and have it with you whenever you visit occasionsthat require peace and attention.
Before arriving, hint them that you have a gift for them if they bring their best behaviorthroughout the ceremony. At any moment the child shows signs of upset (pending tantrum), slowly remind them about the gift you had promised. If the situation escalates, in the early stages you can offer them a sweet and tell them you have a packet waiting for them at home. Without a single doubt, you'll leave a happy parent.
Although this contradicts with the whole ignoring tip, showing love to your kid during this hard times means a lot. Itrevives the good behaviors that you appreciate. While at it, let the child know that you are not mad but outbursts are surely making you think twice.
One of the best ways to show love is by giving them a deep hug and talking them out of their rut. Experts say parental hugs stimulate love and joyous hormones, in turn, making the child feel loved. Again, as they start to calm down, don’t bring back the issuebut rather talk about their problems and assure them that you care about them.
You can also make it a habit of giving them constant hugs whenever they accomplish their tasks to enhance the connection.
6.Put the Child on a Schedule
Putting your child on a clear-cut schedule helps solve two problems with one stone. Wondering how this is possible?A properroutine for your child helps them stay organized both at school and home at the same time positively impact their behavior.A child will know when to eat when to sleep what will happen next thus anxiety which is one of the causes of tantrums won’t be an issue.
Children with symptoms of a spectral autism or anxiety may cause trouble or get frustrated when they are put to do something they were not expecting.For instance, if they normally sleep at 2100hrs and you abruptly tell them to sleep at 1900hrs, you will have aggrieved them.
If the kid doesn’t stop the outburst even with a schedule, try amending it by making it flexible and easy for them.
7.You are the Superior
In other words, this tip entails putting a tight grip on the decisions affecting the child. Dont easily cave in to petty demands to calm the tantrum. Giving in to that M&M candy pack demand will motivate thechild to pull similar stunts whenever they want something. It’s hard to deny the cute kid that toy especially in front of a mob at the mall, buta majority of the people there are parents and will understand, focus on talking the issue out with the kid.
Remember you are the superior and they need to know they can’tcross certain lines. You need to teach them that throwing tantrums is not the right way to request for something.
Although child tantrums can be frustrating to you as a parent, you shouldn’t get overly stressed as they usually outgrow this problem. With the above tips, you should be able to prevent and deal with the problem before it naturally disappears.